The Waiting

Nothing goes well and easily– this is life, isn’t it?

You told me thousands of times about the true meaning of life. I told myself about it too. So I tried my best to toughen up and smile.

I thought I’ve always known about “the life”. About the lightness and heaviness of being. About some people’s lost and win. I shut down myself, locked the door, in order to go with my life in the way it was supposed to be.  From the moment when I was tired of a floating life (not in a free way), it was the time to change.

However, no matter how hard you try to change yourself,  the reality is the reality.

I am sick of waiting. 10 years of waiting for that plane to take off,  5 years of waiting in that row for a moment to come… Every time when you think you reach that place, the door closed.

You’ve done nothing but waited outside the closed door.

Is that true? Is that my freaking life about?

I am so done with it…I want to give up. Please. Tell me to be stronger…Who could come and tell me that?